sabato 12 dicembre 2020

I kill nazis



I wake up early, it is 6.30 on Sunday morning, the police in America just killed a man, the town burns, riots on the streets, everybody talks about this event.

I can smell the stink of my feet, it is awfully disgusting, the shit stinks, even if it is my own one. I have watched a documentary explaining that some invisible beings live on our body.

Got an erection that protects me from pissing on myself. I have been awake for half an hour and I feel like getting high, but I must resist, so I drink coffee and freezing water. I see the police in a war setting, they have killed for the millionth time. People is on the street, it gets beated, shot by gummy gun bullets, it gets plasma TVs and LEGO boxes. I am halfway around the world left with the awareness that life is happening somewhere else, I live a different rhythm.


I have to wash my feet, depending on the position I get, the stench sores straight to my nose. This fricking stomach is in an uproar the whole time, it seems like boiling. On yesterday evening I went to this house in order to purify it with the smudge.


Maybe that wine they gave me was not one of the best. The lady told me: ‘Mister the magician, let’s have this wine, we handmade it’. Mister the magician! What the hell is she talking about! But I said nothing. After years of media bombing, one wins over himself that handmade stuff is the best, I do not think so though, that is my gut does not agree.


A cop in America has stifled a man, stifled with a knee on the neck, while the arrested said ‘ I can’t breathe’. To my mind, there must not be a death penalty, it is precisely to use these bags of shit for experimentation, instead of animals. That shit of a cop did not even get arrested, at first, but today, after three days of protests, they did. But the city is still burning.


I am awake for two hours with my gut in an uproar, I do not have a headache, for the wine was probably good indeed, I cannot breath is the slogan of the protest. Purifying the house got me 200 euros. It is 9.30 A.M., I open a beer, I am at the park.


Fancy ladies walking the dog. I must collect some sage and laurel for the smudge.


The goddess leades my soul, she shows me the path. ‘You should have perhaps avoided getting drunk in the morning’, but it is too nice to drink beer at 9.30 A.M. The air I breathe is good, some insects are flying nearby.


I wear a Milizia H-C T-shirt for protecting myself from maleficient glimpses. A bee is a true pain in the ass, I am thinking about killing it.


I am sitting on a bench under a carob tree writing. Should I not play soccer, like anybody else?


I have been picked by the goddess, instead.


Many would say that is a blessing, many others that I am mad.


Leaves blown away at the corners of the street, children chasing butterflies, me writing on the notebook, pushers selling altered states of consciousness, a cat reaches me looking for food, a light breeze gently touches me, I have another sip of beer. What is my sentence? I look at the flowers and I cannot remember their name, even if I know it.


I think about it hardly, but I do not remember, a baby falls down and calls for her mom, like that man while he was killed by the police. Mother is love, it is just that sometimes you get the bitchy one, and you feel guilty. The alcohol starts working, the workmen stare at the ladies walking the dogs legs, I can hear them whispering sexual innuendos, the wind is rising, I have a sip of beer. I am hungry, or perhaps no, a shrink, a feeling touches my body.

I have been awake for 4 hours, a dove stops on the tree where I am seated below, last thing I need is it shitting over me. I go and sit on the other bench, in the sun this time, the cat follows me. What the hell are these flowers called? Oleanders! An epiphany! I burp, all those present turn around and start talking, sending accusatory glances in my direction. The cat sunbathes, I drink my beer, the pushers sell, the ladies walk the dogs, the children play, a man cannot breathe because of the police; it is just the way it is, and it sucks!


I was the leader of a group of left extremists, now I am an alcoholic writer.


We wanted to change the world, then the lightning, the goddess vision.


I kill insects in the park, always here to the revolution. It is 10 AM on Sunday morning, I feel a little dizzy, I got 200 euros. I buy weed for 20 euros, the transaction is quick, they know me already, I nod  and it is made. The cat does not leave me. In America, as in the rest of the world, the police kills, I go and kill nazis in Call of duty, instead

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